Monday, December 31, 2012

Best Quotes of the Holidays

The holidays always produce a few "laugh out loud" moments. Here are a few of my highlights.

At our office holiday luncheon, Maryann and I were eating the peanut M&M's off the dessert table while everyone else was eating appetizers. Someone jokingly said, "You can't eat those, they're on the dessert table!" Maryann looked at me, picked up the bowl of M&M's and put it on the appetizer table. "Problem solved," she said.

At the same luncheon, Lin was telling us all about a new theater that recently opened up and the hypnotist show her niece went to see. "They hypnotized her and she did that thing where you talk and swear at the same time," Lin said.

"Oh, you mean rap," Deb asked.

"Yes, that's it!"

We all laughed.


My brother and I were both Christmas shopping at the same time, in different stores. He was shopping for me and called and said, "I'm going to get you a present at Cabela's again this year."

I said, "You got me a present at Cabela's last year?"

He replied, in a slightly frustrated tone, "Look down, you're probably wearing it right now - it's that red jacket you wear all the time."

"Oh yeah, I remember now." He didn't get me a present at Cabela's.


The epic fail of the season came after Christmas. The reason I wear the red jacket all the time (despite the fact that I have 6 different jackets) is because my real favorite - the blue Rambo Ride and Ski jacket has a broken zipper. I finally took it to Hartford Cleaners on Friday (after saying I would do it for the last year), and they said. "Sure, we can fix it, but our tailor had an emergency in Korea and we're not sure when she will be back."

I took my jacket with me, and will try to find a different tailor.

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